


Have You Ever Seen Snow Before, Grimmjow?

by chiapetirl



Category: Bleach
Genre: In which Grimmjow learns what a White Elephant really is, M/M, and that he's really not good with emotions, very awkward noodle Grimmjow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:26:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27677353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chiapetirl/pseuds/chiapetirl
Summary: Grimmjow is invited to the first annual Kurosaki Christmas Party, and he has some... conflicting feelings, but he accepts. He asks Kisuke Urahara for help, but he's not prepared when Kisuke dresses him up in a Santa costume and sends him on his way.
Relationships: Grimmjow Jaegerjaques/Kurosaki Ichigo
Comments: 5
Kudos: 23
Collections: GrimIchi Secret Santa Exchange 2020





	Have You Ever Seen Snow Before, Grimmjow?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [NiuNiu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/NiuNiu/gifts).



> This is my submission for the 2020 GrimmIchi Secret Santa for user NiuNiu. I don't know how I've gotten it done so early, but hey! Here we are!

“Ain’t no way in hell.”

Grimmjow glared at the red velvet hat Urahara was handing to him, his face screwing up in disgust. “I ain’t wearin’ it, Hat’n Clogs. Now leave me alone.”

“Aw, come on, Grimmjow!” Urahara’s smile only widened, dangling the Santa hat slightly. “You need to complete the look, you know! Get in character. It’s almost Christmas.” He turned, pointing to the rest of the outfit waiting for him, folded neatly on the register counter. “Trust me, you’ll look fine.”

But Grimmjow shook his head, his anger rising. “It’s dumb. Doubt he’d let me in lookin’ like that.” Despite his protests, a small tinge of pink spread across his cheeks. _Embarrassing_ , he thought. _Why would anyone wanna dress like that?_

“Oh, well, that’s too bad.” Shrugging his shoulders, Urahara turned away, gently folding the hat. “I figured, since you wanted my help for the Kurosaki’s Christmas party, you’d want to go all out. But… I guess you’ll just have to deal with disappointing Ichigo, now won’t you?” He set the hat on the folded costume, patting it gently. Almost _enticingly_.

His ears perking, Grimmjow shot a glance at the costume. The idea that Ichigo would even want to see him dressed up in such a ridiculous costume seemed ludicrous to him. _Why would that damn brat wanna see me like that?_ But he had asked Urahara to help him. It’s not like he knew anything about this stupid Christmas holiday. Or holidays in general. His frown split into a grimace, his eyes closing for a moment. _Ya better appreciate this, kid!_ His light flush went two shades deeper.

“Fine.” Standing up, Grimmjow swiped the costume off the counter. “Ya gotta place to change?”

As if a switch flipped, Urahara turned, a giant grin on his shadowy face and his fan extended. “Of course, we do! Right this way!” He guided Grimmjow to a small room at the far side of the store front, sliding the door open. “Let me know if you need a size up!” Before Grimmjow could snark back, he slid the door shut, leaving the Espada to his own thoughts.

Grimmjow held up the large, red velvet jacket with disdain, sighing in resignation. Just another thing in the World of the Living that made no sense to him whatsoever. If anyone had told him a few months ago he’d be participating in something so stupid, he would have vaporized them on the spot. The white fur trim of the collar brushed against his neck, his fingers begrudgingly buckling the large belt at his waist. His thoughts, however, meandered as he put the rest of the suit on.

* * *

**Two Weeks Prior**

He blinked, staring at the small, embossed card in his hand. A picture of green pine tree covered in twinkling lights and ornaments surrounded by snow covered the front. “The hell’s this for, Kurosaki?” Grimmjow demanded.

White puffs of cold air escaped Ichigo’s lips as he sighed. “We’re having a Christmas party at my house on the 24th. That -” He pointed to the card in Grimmjow’s hands – “is an invitation for you.” He shrugged slightly. “You know, if you’re interested.”

 _The hell’s a Christmas?_ That’s what Grimmjow would’ve asked if he wasn’t so damn stubborn. There was no way he wanted to look stupid in front of Ichigo. He turned the card, seeing the writing on the other side. His eyes squinted as he tried to make out the handwriting.

“Y-you don’t have to go if you don’t want to.” Ichigo shoved his hands in his coat pockets, huddling for warmth. “I just… figured since it’s your first year in the World of the Living, you might want to… I dunno, get out of Urahara’s shop a bit more.”

 _Why’s he lookin’ at me like that?_ Grimmjow looked away, staring down at the card again. _It’s like…_ “Do I gotta bring anythin’?” he grumbled. “I dunno how this works.”

Ichigo paused for a moment, thinking. “I… think Yuzu’s making most of the food, so you don’t need to bring anything extra. But we are having a white elephant exchange, so you might wanna bring something for that.” He pulled the stack of cards out of his coat, reading the back. “Oh, and she asks that you dress festively.” He shot Grimmjow a look. “As long as you have something mildly Christmas related, you should be fine.” A tiny smirk crossed his face. “Other than that, just arrive hungry.”

Mind racing, Grimmjow just stared. _Festive. White Elephants. Food. Jesus Christ_. “Sure, whatever.” He shoved the card in his pocket, doing his best not to ruin it.

Ichigo smiled as he turned away. “I’ll let Yuzu know to expect you. If you have any questions you have my number.” He stepped out of the awning of Urahara’s shop, making his way down the street.

Grimmjow watched, brows furrowed pensively.

_The hell’ve I gotten myself into?_

* * *

**Present Day**

The suit was even more ridiculous than he had imagined. Placing the hat on his head, the dangling white puffball on the end rested on Grimmjow’s ear. He could only imagine what the other Espada would think if they saw him now. _Ain’t got time to think about that,_ he thought. _Almost time to go._ With another long, agitated sigh, Grimmjow opened the door to see the entire staff of Urahara’s Shop waiting for him.

“I told you the Santa suit would be perfect,” Yoruichi said, snapping a few pictures of him with her cell phone.

“It looks so good!” Urahara snapped his fan open, hiding half of his face as he tried not to laugh. “They’re not going to know what hit em!”

“Yes, yes. A good costume.” Tessai looked down at Ururu. “You did an amazing job at putting this suit together last minute.”

Ururu blushed, hiding her face. “Th-thank you, Tessai.”

“HAHA!” Jinta pointed at Grimmjow, holding his sides as he rolled on the floor. “YA LOOK LIKE AN UNDERWEIGHT MALL SANTA! WHAT A LOSER!”

The door handle nearly shattered under Grimmjow’s hand, his back hunching over as he fought back the impulse to drop kick the snickering shopkeeper. “Ya bastards done laughin’ yet?!” He couldn’t show his face, his embarrassment overwhelming. _THEY SET ME UP, DAMMIT! I’LL KILL EM ALL!_

Coming up beside him, Urahara patted Grimmjow on the shoulder. “They’re going to love it, don’t worry.” His voice was a bit calming now, empathetic. “Don’t worry! Hey, I even have your white elephant exchange gift all wrapped and ready for you.” He nodded to Yoruichi, who pulled a package from behind the register counter. “You’re all set and ready to go.” Handing him the gift, Urahara stifled another bout of laughter.

Holding the gift, Grimmjow thought for a moment. _Was this even a good idea?_ His eyes narrowed, fingers pressing into the neat wrapping. _I ain’t gotta clue what this’ll be like._ He shook his head. _What the hell am I so fuckin’ worried about? It’s not like I’m goin’ to battle or somethin’! It’s a damn party…_ And that was the issue, he knew. It was a party. A group of people he wasn’t used to. A new set of eyes to judge him.

“Ya nervous, Moocher?” Jinta taunted him, crossing his arms over his chest. “What’s with that face?”

Glaring at the kid, Grimmjow tucked the gift under his arm. “Say somethin’ else, and I’ll toss yer ass in the river, kid.”

“I’D LIKE TO SEE YA TRY, YA-!”

Placing a hand over Jinta’s mouth, Tessai held him back. “Have a good time at the party, Grimmjow. And just relax. It’s nothing to get too worried about.”

Rolling his eyes, Grimmjow turned toward the door, opening it roughly. “Yeah, yeah.” He tried his best to sound calm. “Bet’ll be stupid, anyways.”

“That’s the spirit, Grimmjow!” Urahara called, waving after him. “Let me know if you end up kissing Kurosaki under the mistletoe!”

“HUH?!” Grimmjow whirled around, red in the face, prepared to kick Urahara. But the door was quickly shut, leaving him with the brief image of Urahara’s mischievous smirk.

_Bastard!_ The cold air pressed against his face. _I’ll get em after this._

With that, he turned, vanishing as he Sonido’d away to the other side of Karakura Town.

* * *

Isshin Kurosaki greeted him at the door, giving Grimmjow a sneaky once over. “Well, this is something I never thought I’d see at my front door!” He laughed. “Come on in, _Santa_!”

Growling slightly, Grimmjow stepped into the entry way, sliding his boots off.

“You came a good time, I’d say.” Isshin stepped out of the entryway, glancing back at Grimmjow with a playful grin on his face. His red and white Christmas sweater hung loosely from his body, a pair of felt antlers sticking out of his messy black hair. “We gotta few people here already and we’re expecting more.” He raised a hand, hiding part of his face from some unseen onlooker. “And it looks like we’re getting ready for an intense round of Go-Fish, so I hope you brought your A-game.”

_My what?_ Grimmjow’s eyes narrowed, a sinking feeling in his gut. That irritating nervousness returned, paralyzing him for a moment. There was a considerable number of presences in the house. He could feel Ichigo’s, but there were far more than he had anticipated. Some human, some Shinigami, Quincy…

_What’re ya so fuckin’ afraid of?_

Forcing his legs to move finally, he stuck his head into the living room, seeing a small gathering around the coffee table. A mop of orange hair caught his eyes first, sitting near the couch. Felt antlers stuck out precariously, his nose painted red. Ichigo was dealing a stack of cards around the table before he looked up, seeing Grimmjow. “Wow, you really did show up!” He sounded surprised.

All eyes turned to see the new guest, with some… mixed reactions amongst them. “Grimm!” Keigo sat up, waving to him. “Hey man! You look great in that Santa Costume!” A pair of badly adhered elf ears protruded from his longish brown hair, the rest hidden under a green elf hat. “Come sit next to me!”

Uryu adjusted his glasses, his focus on the Santa suit as well. “The workmanship on that suit is really good. Where’d you get it, Jaegerjaquez?”

Grimmjow shuffled through the living room, sitting rigidly between Keigo and Mizuiro. “Ururu made it,” he muttered, noticing Mizuiro’s not so subtle attempts to stifle laughter.

“Dude, you really went all out on that costume.” Mizuiro leaned against the table. “And I thought Keigo and I were going all out on these elf ears.” His sweater jingled as he moved, the small bells sewn into the collar jostling a little bit.

“I love it!” Orihime exclaimed, clasping her hands excitedly. “Look, we match, Grimm!” She stood up, showing off her Santa dress as she quickly put on her own Santa hat. The fur trim shimmered as iridescent strands stuck out from the white fur. “But your costume looks so cool.”

On the other side of the table, Rukia was nudging a seething Renji, whispering, “Hey, be nice. It’s supposed to be a fun time, Renji.”

“Why is _he_ here?” Renji grumbled back, glaring at Grimmjow. “Did you know he was comin’?”

Rukia shook her head. “But that doesn’t matter. Don’t start any fights with him.” The small holly-adorned clips in her hair stood out, her white dress sporting red curved trim along the collar and sleeves. “Besides, Byakuya is still coming to the party later, so you wouldn’t want to make him upset.”

Glowering in silence, Renji said nothing more, his eyes boring holes into Grimmjow’s forehead.

_Bastard’s still mad about me hurtin’ the pipsqueak, huh_? He shot back a look of disgust. _Cry me a damn river, Shinigami._ His eyes wandered over to Ichigo, who was counting a few cards from the deck in the middle.

“I’m really surprised, Grimmjow.” Ichigo handed him a small deck of cards before gathering his own. “I didn’t think you’d take getting festive this seriously.” His smile widened a bit as he shuffled his cards.

_Dammit, I knew it!_ Grimmjow cursed himself, wanting to run back and punch that mischievous grin off the shopkeeper’s face.

“Funnily enough, that works really well for you.” Ichigo laughed a bit. “Yuzu’s gonna love that.”

It wasn’t the reaction Grimmjow had expected. He thought Ichigo would’ve laughed in his face. He felt that tension in his shoulders ease a bit, his back straightening. _Huh…_ He picked up his cards, glancing at the odd pictures. “Whatever.”

“You have the game set up yet, Ichigo?!” A girl’s voice carried from the kitchen, getting closer as her muffled footsteps grew closer. “Because I’ve been itching to play all day.” A dark-haired girl leapt over the couch, squeezing between Orihime and Ichigo. A string of rainbow-color lights hung around her necks, flickering with every passing second. “And I’ll beat Uryu this time, that’s a promise.” Karin lifted her cards, shuffling through them quickly

Shooting Karin a sly glance, Uryu straightened his back, facing off with her. “Oh? Is that a fact, Kurosaki?” His faux-serious expression was half hidden by his cards.

_That old man wasn’t kiddin’ when he said intense_. Grimmjow stared down at the cards again, unsure what to do.

“You need me to tell you the rules, Grimmjow?” Tatsuki appeared from the kitchen as well, munching down on a cookie she had stolen away. She sat on the other side of Orihime, leaning casually. “It’s pretty simple.”

“Sure.” He looked up, attempting to turn the cards. “What do these-?”

“Ah, ah!” Keigo grabbed his arm gently, stopping him. “First rule of Go-Fish, you don’t show the other players your cards. Keep them hidden!” Grimmjow grumbled, but did as he was told, holding them so tight that the tips of his fingers turned white.

Smirking a bit, Tatsuki finished a second bite of her cookie. “We’re each gonna go around the table, asking for a card that matches one we have in our hands. If you ask a person for a particular card and they don’t have it, they’ll say, ‘go fish’ and you pick up a card from this stack.” She patted the stack of yellow cards in the middle of the table. “If you draw the card you were asking for from the stack, you get to go again. If not, you gotta wait your turn.” She picked up her cards, preparing herself. “Make sense?”

“How to I tell the difference between the cards?” he asked.

Tatsuki tapped the top of the back of her cards. “There should be a little thing at the top that tells you the name of the card.”

“Got it.” He settled into his seat, glancing up at Ichigo. He looked calm, cool as a cucumber. _Why the hell am I so nervous? Focus, will ya?_

“Since you got to the table last, you go first, Tatsuki,” Uryu called, readying himself. “Good luck, everyone.”

She smirked, staring him down. “Gotcha.” Looking around the table, her eyes stopped on Rukia. “Got any pufferfish, Rukia?”

Shaking her head, Rukia grinned triumphantly. “Go fish!”

Grabbing a card, Tatsuki added it to her pile, glancing at Orihime. “You go, Hime.”

“Right! Ichigo, do you have an Octopus?”

_I’ve got this_. Grimmjow watched as the game slowly came around his way, making sure he paid attention. _Got this… got this…_

“Your turn, Grimm.” Mizuiro shot him a glance.

The tension in the air was thick. All eyes were on him again, hands guarding their cards closely. _Jesus Christ, you’d think someone was getting’ ready for a counterattack. Who the hell do I…?_ “Kurosaki.”

The substitute Shinigami looked up, at the ready.

Grimmjow locked eyes with him for a moment, contemplating what to say. “Ya got any eels, kid?”

Tilting his head to the side, Ichigo smirked. “Sure do.” Without looking away, he pulled a card from his deck, handing it to Grimmjow.

_Wow… didn’t expect that._ Cautiously, Grimmjow took the card, his fingers inches apart from Ichigo’s. As he paired it with the other card in his hand, he looked lost for a second, unsure how to proceed.

“You put the pair face up on the table,” Ichigo offered.

“Thanks.” He looked away. Setting them down, Grimmjow looked around the table again. “Quincy.”

Slightly startled, Uryu glanced his way. “Yes?”

“Got a squid?”

“Go fish.”

_Damn_. Grimacing, he drew a card, pulling it into his deck.

The more they played, the less he felt that stinging sensation in his muscles. The tension in the air quickly turned to something more… mellow. It was fast paced, a lot more fun than Grimmjow had anticipated. He was almost upset when it was over, watching as Karin squealed in excitement as she reeled in her winnings. “Take that, Uryu!”

“This is just one victory, Karin.” The Quincy shot her a knowing smirk. “You won’t be so lucky next time.”

“I told you you’d get a hang of the game,” Keigo whispered. “It’s pretty easy.”

“Guess so.” Grimmjow couldn’t keep his eyes off of Ichigo’s face. There was that smile again. It wasn’t like anything he’d seen in battle. He’d seen Ichigo’s confident smirk, that familiar glint in his eyes when he knew he was winning. This wasn’t that. It was… carefree. I ain’t ever seen him like this.

Ichigo looked back. “You up for another round, Grimmjow?” He began to shuffle the cards.

He hesitated a moment before grinning from ear to ear. “Hell yeah, kid.” _I’ll beat ‘im, for sure._

“Yo, Espada.” Renji called from the other side of the table, scowling. “You got a crab?”

“Nah.” Grimmjow smirked. “Go fish, Shinigami.”

“Bullshit.”

“Wrong game, Renji,” Rukia said. “Pick up a card.”

Renji wanted to protest, but quietly picked up a card before glaring at Grimmjow again.

_Suck it, Shinigami!_

“Everyone!” A small girl appeared, standing behind the couch as she tried to get the attention of the room. “Snacks and the like are all ready! But make sure not to stuff yourself, as we’ll be eating dinner in about two hours or so!”

“Food!” Keigo shot up, racing Tatsuki and grappling with her before running towards the dining room.

Standing up, Ichigo placed his cards on the table. “Guess we’ll pick this back up in a few minutes.”

Hands in his pockets, Grimmjow was the last to follow, awkwardly stumbling into the kitchen. Keigo was already piling gyoza on his plate, followed by whatever else he could fine. Tatsuki was munching on another stocking-shaped cookie, laughing at something Orihime said.

“Thank you for coming, Grimmjow!” Looking down, he could see Yuzu standing next to him, holding a spatula. “I’m so glad to see you dressed up! I meant to tell Ichigo to tell you that you didn’t need to worry too much about dressing up festively, but I’m glad you dressed up!” She giggled. “Help yourself if you’re hungry!”

“Uh… thanks…” He rubbed the back of his head, peering into the kitchen again.

For a few seconds, Yuzu seemed to contemplate something before asking, “Do… you want me to just bring you a small plate out here?”

His brows furrowed. “Yeah, sure.” He met her eyes, seeing her smile widen a bit before she disappeared into the flurry of people.

Slowly, he made his way back to the living room, taking a second to breathe. _They’re just kids, ya idiot,_ he tried telling himself. _Ain’t no reason to be nervous_. But he was relieved to be away, sitting on the couch. Adjusting his jacket, he laid back, taking off his hat.

“You’re not a huge people person, are you?”

He looked over, seeing Karin sitting on the far side of the couch. “Or maybe you’re just not used to huge gatherings.” She took a bite, looking at him. “I don’t think I really expected that from you.”

_This brat..._ He stared at her in disbelief, unsure what to say. But her gaze was unwavering, legs crossed under her. She didn’t look the slightest bit nervous around him. “Can’t say I blame you, though.” She took another bite, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand. “I’ve never been that big on hanging out in big groups. This is actually our first year throwing a party like this.” She nodded towards the kitchen. “Yuzu wanted to boost morale around here. Funnily enough, Ichigo was the one who thought to invite you. Your name was the first he put on the list.”

“Kurosaki did?” His response was faster than he meant it to be. Eyes narrowing, he turned to face her a bit more. “Really?”

Her lips curled slightly. A knowing smile. “He sure did. I wasn’t sure why at first.” She set her plate on the table. “I thought maybe it was to get you used to us, since you were gonna be around more. But then you got here, and it kinda made more sense.”

“What’re ya talkin’ about, kid?”

Karin leaned into the palm of her hand, smile widening a bit. “Well, I think it’s the same reason you’re here.”

Though they were different colors, Karin’s eyes looked almost exactly like Ichigo’s. That confident, natural gaze. It pierced him, cutting through his defenses. _It runs in the family_ , he thought. He shook his head, chuckling slightly. “Yer whole family’s trouble, ain’t it?”

“Here you go, Grimmjow!” Yuzu rounded the corner, carrying a paper plate with a plastic cup full of red liquid. “I tried to get a little bit of everything. If you don’t like anything, feel free to not eat it.” She set them on the table, beaming. “Enjoy!”

Reaching for the plate of food, he stared at the unfamiliar items. Going from a steady diet of Hollows to… whatever this all was certainly was disconcerting. Reaching for something small and deep-fried in batter, he brought it to his mouth, crunching down. It was greasy, the breading parting to reveal… meat.

“What do Hollow’s normally eat, anyway?” Karin asked, taking a swig of her drink. “Because you sure as hell don’t look like you know what you’re eating.”

He swallowed. “Other Hollows, mostly.” Taking another bite, he relished in her changed expression.

“Guess I should’ve expected that.” She laughed, reaching for her plate again. “I guess the point I was trying to make is, you don’t have to be nervous.”

“I ain’t nervous.”

She shot him a look. “You’re acting like an awkward middle school boy who’s going to his first day of class. And I would know, considering I _am_ in middle school.” Taking another bite of food, she pointed at him with her plastic fork. “You’re among friends. Ichigo wants you to be here, and we’re not necessarily the most… normal people to begin with. We’re not judging you…” She paused, eyes narrowing. “Okay, maybe Renji is. But regardless of that, you’re in good company. Relax.”

Taking a deep breath, Grimmjow closed his eyes. _Good god, even Kurosaki’s kid sister can tell I’m outta my fuckin’ element_. He cracked a small smirk. “Alright, kid. Fine.” He grabbed his drink, taking a long swig. It was tart and sweet all at once, causing his face to screw up. It was his first time ever tasting something like it. “But why’d he-?”

There was a loud knock at the door, sending the cacophony of voices in the kitchen into a tizzy. “Coming!” Yuzu ran to the door, wiping her apron clean before opening it. “Welcome! Come on in! We have some food ready for you all to enjoy!”

* * *

Afternoon quickly turned into night, time flying as festivities ensued. Grimmjow found it all to be a whirlwind, not suffocating but a bit… overwhelming. There were more Shinigami in one room than he had ever seen in person. Side glances from high ranking Shinigami and a handful of Visoreds came his way; he let them slide as he tried to ignore them, focusing all his attention on only one face.

It was… surprising, really. To see so many new expressions on the substitute Shinigami’s face. Confusion, embarrassment, terror, laughter, concentration: it was like he was looking at completely different person. All the while, the other humans spoke to Grimmjow like they had known him for years and years. Letting him on inside jokes. Teaching him the rules to the oddest games he’d ever heard. Eating bizarre food. Singing, even. He wasn’t sure if that was a thing anyone ever did in Las Noches. In fact, he was almost confident no one sang in Las Noches unless it was to mock someone as they landed a killing blow.

He was also quite surprised to find that there were, in fact, no White Elephants to be seen at the white elephant exchange. Instead, he found himself with a strange rubber keychain in the shape of a cloud-like character. “You got that keychain?!” Renji looked enraged. “That was from Captain Kuchiki, you ungrateful bastard! He had those custom made!”

Rukia pulled Renji back, pulling Grimmjow to the side. “Sorry about him. Would you trade the Wakame Ambassador keychain for this pack of mochi?” She pointed to the box of yuzu-flavored mochi, the ribbon still attached. “It would mean a lot to Renji to have something from my brother. You don’t have to, but I figured I’d ask.”

“Yeah, whatever.” He tossed her the keychain, rolling his eyes. “Didn’t want it anyways.” He’d never seen a Shinigami so worked up over something so trivial in his life.

It wasn’t until they were all sitting around for dinner that he realized that he was… exhausted. He wanted to blame it all on the stupid gigai, feeling it weigh heavily on him. But it was his soul as well, absorbing the warmth of the room, hearing the voices of those around him echoing back. It was all so foreign to him, and yet somehow, he felt… welcomed. Wanted. He caught Ichigo glancing at him, eyes glistening in the flickering lights of the tree. Every time they looked away, Grimmjow felt a pit in his stomach. _Bastard…_

Karin nudged him during desert, beckoning for him to bend down. “You need a breather?” she whispered. “You look ready to pass out.”

_Why the hell’s she so good at readin’ me like a damn book?_ It was honestly impressive. But he nodded once, glancing back at all the faces.

“If you go upstairs, find the room at the end of the hall. That’ll be Ichigo’s room. Open the window and you should be able to get to the roof.”

The mention of Ichigo made his eyes widen a bit. Looking at her for a second, he scooted back his chair. “Thanks, kid.” He silently snuck away, climbing the dark stairway to the second floor.

He didn’t know what to expect when seeing Ichigo’s room. In fact, he wasn’t quite sure how most people kept their rooms in the World of the Living. The bed in the corner looked rumpled, moonlight spilling down from the window across the foot of it and onto the floor. Posters covered the wall, a guitar in the corner near the closet. All shadows in the darkness to him. Traces of Ichigo’s spiritual presence lingered, giving him pause.

Grimmjow had no idea what he was doing, listlessly reaching for the window. Maybe it was the exhaustion, maybe it was the overwhelming fact that he was in the same place Ichigo was most of the time; either way, he found himself hesitant to leave. Then, he shook himself, forcing the window open and crawling out into the cold night air.

It was relieving, being out in the open. The night sky was clear, minus the puffs of white air that escaped his lips. Grimmjow loosened the Santa jacket, laying on his back as he stared up at the sky. It was almost easy to forget he was in the World of the Living when he couldn’t see the skyline. But a twinkling star would catch his attention, piercing through the light pollution every now and again.

“Mind if I join you?”

Ichigo’s voice filtered through the bitter cold breeze, startling Grimmjow a little. He sat up, watching as the kid climbed up onto the roof, carefully shuffling along until he could sit less than a foot away from Grimmjow. “Figured I needed to get away, too.”

Grimmjow was frozen. He didn’t know how to react, staring at Ichigo’s dimly lit silhouette.

“Thanks for coming.” Ichigo’s voice was warm. “I was really hoping you wouldn’t be scared off.”

“I ain’t scared of y’all.” Grimmjow found his voice, lips curling into a feral smile. “Just a buncha kids, anyways.”

Ichigo laughed. “Exactly. It was just gonna be the few of us you saw when you first got there, but word got around in the Soul Society, and Yuzu can’t say no to more guests.” He gave him a knowing glance. “She loves being a host.”

“I was wonderin’ where all those Shinigami were comin’ from.” The word left a bitter taste in his mouth. “First time bein’ around bunch of em without them clamborin’ to kill me.”

They both laughed this time, white plumes of cold air rising above their heads, vanishing moments later.

It took a minute before Ichigo spoke again. “I really do like the costume, by the way. It’s really cool. Bet Urahara forced it on you, though.”

Grimmjow felt like the air had been sucked out of his lungs. He could feel the fur trim rustling against his cold skin. “Couldn’t really say no,” he said, pulling his legs close to his chest as he pretended he couldn’t feel the cold. “Ururu probably would’ve cried her eyes out.” And the _last_ thing he ever wanted was to see that girl burst out crying again. It was traumatizing.

“Oh, that I understand.” Orange hair rustled gently in the wind, warm light from below illuminating the underside of each tuft.

They went silent for a few minutes, the muted sounds of cars passing by and people walking the streets the only things that could be heard. Grimmjow opened his mouth, wanting to say something then immediately deciding against it.

“You wanna know why I invited you, don’t you?”

Grimmjow jumped immediately into a stream of questions. “Why did ya invite me? Your little sister told me I was the first on the list. What the hell were ya thinkin’? I don’t-!” He stopped, seeing Ichigo’s expression.

“I told you when I gave you the invitation,” Ichigo said. “You’ve been here for months and yet you’ve stepped out of that dusty old shop maybe three times. And besides… you helped us win the fight against Aizen. You’re a part of the friend group now, whether you realize it or not.” His voice had a serious note to it, but his voice remained warm.

“But… that don’t explain-!”

“For crying out loud, Grimmjow. I just wanted you to be here.” Ichigo shrugged dramatically. “There’s no ulterior motive. No grand scheme. I wanted you to be here. With us. And you were the first person I thought of when Yuzu asked. I was worried about you.” Grimmjow could just make out Ichigo’s face, the purposeful look he gave him. “Is that a good enough answer for you?”

Turning away, Grimmjow didn’t say a word.

“Why’d you come to the party?” Ichigo asked. “I think that’s the better question.”

“Cause…” He struggled to find the words _. Because I was bored. Because I wanted to see ya more. Because… ya annoy the shit out of me…_

_“Let me know if you end up kissing Kurosaki under the mistletoe!”_

Urahara’s joke replayed in his head over and over again. He didn’t want to admit it, but it bothered him. _The fuck did that asshole say that for? I don’t wanna kiss this dumbass. I don’t!_

“Just… because?” Ichigo laughed, shaking his head. “Well, guess that about sums it up, doesn’t it?” He stood up, slowly making his way down the roof. “I’m heading back. Don’t let yourself freeze up here, or Kisuke’ll-.”

“Ya know I’ll kick yer ass one day, right?” The words were harsh as Grimmjow spat them out. He couldn’t look up, eyes locked on the street below. “I’ll prove to ya that I’m stronger.” His hands turned to fists, his body going warm as he felt his frustration rise. “Just ya wait, Kurosaki.”

Ichigo laughed again, a bitter laugh that grated against Grimmjow. “You’re still on that? After everything? My god…” He turned, leaning forward, his face completely covered in shadow. “You know what, Grimmjow? You’re probably right. You might kick my ass. But who the hell cares? Why are you still on about that? Especially right now.”

“ _BECAUSE I HATE YA!_ ” Grimmjow’s voice echoed for miles, drowning out any sound from below. His body moved quickly, his hands grabbing at the thick sweater Ichigo war and tugging him forward. “God I _fuckin’_ hate ya! I hate the way you are, _every god damn thing_!” He was panting, his chest seizing as he let it flow out. “The way ya look at me, that stupid grin on yer face, the way…” He stopped, realizing he was slipping. “ _Fuck!_ ”

He couldn’t see Ichigo’s face, but he didn’t want to. It was unbearable. Despite it all, he didn’t feel any better. He didn’t feel that sense of relief he was hoping for. What made it worse was that Ichigo was completely silent, motionless. “Say somethin’, kid.”

Placing a hand on Grimmjow’s ball fists, Ichigo squeezed slightly. “I’m waiting for you to finish.” It was hard to tell from his voice what he was thinking. “I want to know how much you-.”

It was an impulse. Certainly not something he would’ve done in his right mind. Pulling Ichigo forward, Grimmjow felt their lips lock. _No, this ain’t right_. He inhaled shakily, one hand now on the back of Ichigo’s head. _This ain’t right! WHAT’RE YA DOIN’?!_

To his surprise, Ichigo didn’t pull away. Didn’t fight back. He couldn’t be sure in the dark, but he felt him pull closer of his own volition. It felt like an eternity before their lips pulled apart, leaving them both silent. Grimmjow’s breath was shaky, his limbs trembling. _It’s from the cold,_ he told himself. _Damn gigai._

It wasn’t till Ichigo chuckled that Grimmjow realized what he had done. His whole face was on fire, his chest tightening. “That’s some intense hatred you have there, Grimmjow.” It was a joke, said between laughter.

“Fuck off, Kurosaki.” His retorts were half-hearted.

Ichigo’s head bent down, shaking as he laughed again. “You really know how to make a guy feel special.”

Purposefully this time, Grimmjow reached out, raising Ichigo’s head as he pulled him back in for another kiss. It was just as warm as if had been before, fingers weaving into the shaggy orange tufts of hair.

Something cold touched the back of Grimmjow’s hand, startling him slightly. He pulled back, looking up to see gentle flakes falling from the heavy sky. “The… hell?”

“Oh, you’ve never seen snow before, have you?” Ichigo looked up, catching a few flakes in his open palm. “Guess you guys don’t have that in Hueco Mundo. It’s been a while since it’s snowed on Christmas Eve, though. Great timing.”

The snowflakes grew before his eyes, drifting silently downward to the street below. Grimmjow could hear the front door opening, party goers shrieking in delight as they celebrated the snowfall. But it was all a backdrop to the substitute Shinigami that sat balanced on the side of the roof, his elbows resting on his knees. Grimmjow could feel the piercing cold through his Santa suit, sinking into his bones.

“We should head back inside,” Ichigo said at last, his voice low. “Yuzu’s probably wondering where I ran off to.”

Grimmjow grabbed his sleeve, stopping him for a moment. “Don’t got tellin’ anyone about this, kid.”

“I won’t.” The words were gentle. “Now come on. Bet you’re freezing your ass off.” Ichigo grabbed Grimmjow’s wrist, pulling him behind him.

_Hat’n’Clogs can never know._ He slowly made his way down the roof, snowflakes sticking to his hands, melting quickly. _I’ll kill him if he ever finds out._

For the first time that evening, that gnawing feeling in Grimmjow’s stomach had completely faded, leaving him calm long into the night.

**Author's Note:**

> NiuNiu, I sincerely hope you like your Secret Santa! It was incredibly fun to write and it's actually my very first time writing for GrimmIchi (which is weird, because I've loved GrimmIchi since high school, but whatevs! First time for everything!). I'm not the best at writing for romance (I try, but I'm more of a Gen fic person apparently), but I did my best and it made me want to write more GrimmIchi later down the road.


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